11.26.2007

Statement #2

I was once involved in a relationship with Kael T. Block. It began in the Summer of 2003 when I met him in SF. In December 2003 I went to visit with him in Paris, and it was when I was on his turf that the dynamic of our relationship completely changed. He expected me to be subservient to him, and when I made it obvious I would not be then he enjoyed belittling, humiliating, and fighting with me. I learned a lot about his true character during this trip, and I remember he would say things that really disturbed me. I looked to my old journal to find a direct quote I jotted down. A girl at his school had teased him in away that made him very angry and he told me,” I want to bend her over the toilets and fuck her till her forehead is bloodied by the mirror.”
The week before I left Kael and Paris for good we had two fights that ended in Kael sexually assaulting me. This was two and a half years ago, but I remember vividly how much he fucked with my head and body. It still gives me anxiety to recall everything. I will focus on two incidents I remember specifically for this statement. In both these situations Kael forced sex on me when he knew I was pissed at him and very obviously did not want it. We fought and then Kael used physical and sexual assault to assert power over me. He pinned my arms, pried apart my legs and continued even when I yelled, no, no, no, no, Fuck Off, and etcetera. In the second incident I remember he got super pissed off at me and pinned me beneath him, only defense with my hands pinned was to bite him hard on the shoulder, which got him madder. He forced me to have sex and held my head back so he could spit directly into my face in a very violent manner.

These were not lovers games we played or some sort of “make-up sex.” In these incidents I was forced into sex when I clearly did not want to even be near him. There is no way that Kael could have been confused into thinking I wanted to have sex with him, I yelled no like a mantra, struggled, fought back, and used all of my strength to fight him. We didn’t explore any heavy role-play or S&M in our relationship, or even talk about a possible future of exploring such things. These incidents were not sex games they were Kael using sexual dominance to assault me.

I broke it off with Kael the night before I left because I was scared to do it prior while I was still staying with him. Still, the way he had treated me affected me for a long time afterwards. For more then six months after that I could not have a sexual encounter without being in complete and total control the entire time. When it came to my next serious intimate relationship we waited a while to have sex because the first time I was with her she said she could feel how much my last partner had fucked me up sexually.

Oh, I should include that I had another incident with Kael a year after we broke up when I was at a club and he pinned me to a wall and shoved his hand in my skirt, and into my pussy. I had a girlfriend at the time and he knew this, and that I was not at all interested in him. My best friend witnessed this and she said, “Get the fuck off of her.” Kael then said, “You know you liked it,” and walked away.

Over the past few years I have told my close friends that I felt Kael sexually assaulted me and I have always voiced a strong opinion against his projects. I knew he was a bad person but I wasn’t fully aware of what he was capable of until just last week when I got a phone call from a friend telling me that Kael had in fact raped someone. I felt awful for not being able to tell the entire world about my experiences with Kael, because that might of saved this girl emotional trauma. I now believe that Kael’s assaults have grown braver and more predatory, because his sense of power has grown with each violation that he has gotten away with. This has led up to this latest incident, in which Kael has very blatantly and intentionally committed rape and responded in a delusional manner with defenses such as, “my conscious is clear.”

Now there is a collective group of voices and Kael can not deny that his actions are negatively affecting women. I truly hope that Kael can someday understand how much hurt he has caused sexual partners, for the sake of his future partners and himself, and that he admits he has a problem so he can heal himself. One of his “elder’ advisors recently informed me that some of Kaels excuses were that in France they don’t have the same rape issues, or also that Kael is attempting to read up and learn how to be a better BDSM top, and also that Kael’s current crime was just an accident in which safe words weren’t negotiated. To that I say along with all these other women’s voices in these statements, that NO, NO, NO, NO is a pretty fucking universal safe word for everyone, loud and clear.